The Undrafted Free Agent

I Spoke Too Soon

noreply@blogger.com (mgaske) — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 23:55:00 +0000

Well, I was right that the Crawford/Harrington trade could set in motion more trades. No way did I think that those trades would start happening within hours.

Apparently Zach Randolph and Mardy Collins have been shipped (pun intended) to the Clippers for Cuttino Mobley and Tim Thomas. I assumed that Chicago would be the team to make a play for Randolph, but I was right that it would be in exchange for an over-paid shooting guard and a useless forward.

These two moves put New York in a much better financial position. And even in the short term, I'm not sure that New York won't be better. David Lee gets to play a larger role (which should have happened earlier), Wilson Chandler likely gets to play a little more and now Nate Robinson is the only blackhole on the team. So ball movement should be much much better. Plus, Knicks fans won't have to watch this:

or this

New York is Reintroduced to Logical Trades

noreply@blogger.com (mgaske) — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 21:55:00 +0000

News is out that the Knicks have traded Jamal Crawford to Golden State for Al Harrington. I have to say, it’s strange to read about a Knicks trade that makes sense. In this case, it was a great trade for both teams. For now, because logical moves in New York have been so rare, we’re going to look at the Knicks side of this.

The Knicks desperately need cap relief. Their payroll is larger than some small countries (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_GDP_(nominal) ) And to state the obvious, they don’t have a lot to show for all that spending. Enter Al Harrington. He has two years left on his contract while Crawford still has three more years at an average of $9mil per. And what’s more, this trade makes the Knicks much more “Mike D’Antoni Friendly”.

So far, the lineup most used by D’Antoni is Chris Duhon, Crawford, Quentin Richardson, Wilson Chandler and Zach Randolph. This trade gives them more depth and size in the front court (either with Harrington backing up the 3 and the 4, or by having him start at the 4). It also gives them a forward who can shoot the ball. More than anything, it could set in motion a series of trades. Here’s how: Having another guy who can competently play PF frees them up to explore more trades involving Zach Randolph. Now that they have Harrington, Donnie Walsh doesn’t need to get back a big man in exchange for Randolph. A trade with desperate-for-interior scoring Chicago becomes much easier to pull off now (say, Larry Hughes and Cedric Simmons).

The Crawford/Harrington trade leaves the backcourt a little thin, so more of the front court can be jettisoned to help out there. With Richardson, Harrington, David Lee and Chandler still there to play the 3 and 4 spots, Danilo Gallinari is expendable. Utah could be a destination. If Boozer leaves in the offseason, Kirilenko can start at his natural power forward position. Gallinari may fit in well at the SF position. So, Ronnie Price and Jarron Collins for Gallinari. This would give NY more cap relief and a competent guard.

I’m guessing that it will be impossible to trade Curry this season (useless and two years left on his contract), but you never know. Either way, shedding Randolph’s contract and getting some help in the backcourt certainly makes New York’s future look a little brighter.

Dear LeBron James...

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 20:57:00 +0000

Your Highness,

Let me preface my comments by saying this: You're a great player. Nobody, absolutely nobody, has your combination of speed, strength, intelligence, and skill. You will be a legend of the game, which is why I'm writing you.

We both know you're great. You don't have to work the cameras like you do. Just look at yourself in these pictures.

After each dunk, each highlight, you face the crowd, the scrub trying to guard you, or your teammates. More often, you face the the cameras. You pose. You scream. You do everything, except run back down the court.

Why? So we take notice of your greatness? Sorry, but we already have.

Last Wednesday,you took to dancing midplay. You shook your leg, your body, and Drew Gooden. You freed up Delonte West for an open three. But what made the nightly highlights? This: "OmGZ! Luk at Leebrone!"

Again, I ask you to stop. Enough is enough.

Sincerely,

Mr. Crimson

NBA players to watch out for this season

noreply@blogger.com (mgaske) — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 06:11:00 +0000

Because Hollinger, Rotoworld, Sports Guy, SI and Chad Ford haven't covered the "breakout players" for the 08-09 season enough, I offer my own take. Although mine is slightly different. This isn't so much about who is going to break out and put up a huge year, but about guys who will be vastly more important to their team's success this season. So without further ado...

Marvin Williams (Hawks) - He showed a decent amount of talent last season as a scorer. Given his size and athleticism, he ought to be a better rebounder and shot blocker, but he at least showed he can play. With the under-rated Josh Childress gone, Marv needs to step up if the Hawks want to make the playoffs for a second year in a row.

Nene (Nuggets) - With Marcus Camby gone, Kenyon Martin (he's officially lost the K-Mart moniker at this point to Kevin Martin) constantly injured and the #3 big man being Steven Hunter, Nene needs to be very very good. He's got a ton of talent. When he's been healthy and in shape, he's looked fantastic. But given the thin front line and the injury history of the front line, Nene has to stay healthy and in shape if Denver wants to even stay in playoff contention.

Amir Johnson (Pistons) - Sheed and McDyess are both 34 and Jason Maxiell is a very good player, but he's not carrying this team up front. The Pistons need Amir Johnson, who they've been developing forever, to be ready. He's a fabulous shot blocker, good rebounder and efficient (if limited) scorer. But his foul rate so far has been too high to keep him on the floor. He is an incredible talent, but if he can't cut down on the fouls without being nearly as productive, then Detroit isn't going anywhere. Plus if he isn't ready, then Sheed really can't be traded. So a lot is at stake with Johnson.

Ramon Sessions (Bucks) - He had a ridiculous end to last season, putting up 11 apg in March, including a 24 assist game. The other PG on Milwaukee is Luke Ridnour, so if the Bucks are to make the playoffs, Sessions is going to have to establish himself as at least 2/3 the player he was last March.

Devin Brown (Hornets) - New Orleans big acquisition over the summer was James Posey. They WAY overpaid for him and neglected their thin front line in order to do so. Last season (in addition to the two prior seasons), Mo Pete proved that he isn't the answer at shooting guard. With Pargo no longer around to play the "2 PG lineup", Brown has to be very good if this team is going to contend for a title. Posey is solid, but he can't really play the 2 very well, so Brown has to be able to play 25-30 minutes per game without sitting too much because of injuries or screwing up to badly. Let's just say that a lot is riding on his production.

Rashard Lewis (Magic) - Mickael Pietrus is very important to this teams' success. Last year they had a gaping hole (that's what she said) at the SG spot. This year Jameer Nelson is the only decent PG on the team. Both of those guys are intregal to Orlando's success. But Rashard Lewis' absurd contract has tied the teams hands in terms of free agency and trades, so he HAS to play well. He's known has being little more than a jumpshooter, but he played excellent perimeter and post defense in the playoffs. If can even come close to his 2008 playoffs intensity and focus, then Orlando might come withing $30 mil of his actual value. And they also would have a legit shot at making the Eastern Conference Finals.

Tim Duncan (like don't know his team) - With Manu out and Parker only able to carry so much of the load, Timmy needs to step it up. He can't have a 19 and 11 season this year if San Antonio wants to have any hope at all of winning another title. We need to see a 23-12-2.5 (blk) from Duncan if they want home court in the first round. I actually think that Ian Mahinmi will do quite well this year and help out in the front court, but it all has to start with Duncan. I know he is 32 and hasn't played more than 35 mpg in five years, but he's going to have to average 38 or 39 minutes per game this season and San An needs him to be much better than last year in those minutes. I don't think San Antonio can win another title, but if they do, it's going to be on Duncans back.

Jermaine O'Neal (Raptors) - They have a blank at SG - Anthony Parker is about to fall off a cliff - but if O'Neal can stay healthy and (like Sessions) can be even 2/3 of the player he was, then Toronto has a shot at finally moving past #4 in the East. If O'Neal can stay healthy and regain some of his production, then the Raptors fans might have a chance to witness a Toronto team that protects the paint, saves Chris Bosh from having to guard 7-foot 260 pounders and finally breaks the 50 win mark. But it all hinges on O'Neal.

So that's my first post on The Undrafted Free Agent. Check back (like voting) early and often.

Linebackers: An Assembly Guide

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Sun, 31 Aug 2008 13:45:00 +0000

The linebacker was created with a single purpose: play a support role for the defensive line, much like a safety provides protect for a cornerback. Of course, as with anything, the position developed into much more than that.

Didja know Ray Lewis was pretty good?

The most important thing to remember when thinking linebacker is assignment, assignment, assignment. Much like a safety, they need to be quite versatile. Even in schemes that ask just specific tasks from their linebackers, versatility is a linebacker's best friend.

Historically, linebacker has been a position where, based on scheme, they can be vital stars of the defense or simple role players. Because their assignments can be so diverse in most defensive schemes, you will often find offensive lines adjusting their protection schemes based on what they percieve from the linebackers. A good LB corps can conceal their true intentions by masking it with something that percieves an entirely different assignment. While it sounds simple, it's no easy task, and requires some smart play from all three (or four) backers.

Defensive fronts also play a big part in how linebackers are used and what assignments are given to each one. The basic two base fronts, the 4-3 and 3-4, are more deeply explained in the Football Schemes guide.
Skill sets

Linebackers have a wide variety of skills that all types of linebackers have to varying degrees. While they can get by being really good at only 1 or 2 of these, the best linebackers are athletic enough to do it all with success.

Speed. Not entirely vital, but a speedy linebacker -- or at least a linebacker with some burst to their initial movements -- can be great for nullifying off-tackle runs and or blitzing.
Tackling. Linebackers need to be able to solo tackle, preventing larger gains.
Covering. This goes for both zone and man assignments, though zone assignments at this position are more likely. They need to be able to locate the ball and contain their man or zone with authority. A linebacker good in coverage will be able to eliminate a majority of the easier over-the-middle catches with a good separating hit or simply by blocking the throwing lane.
Jamming. Particularly the outside backers and especially the weak-side backer, a linebacker needs to be able to (occasionally) move into the slot and jam the receiver long enough to disrupt the timing or force the receiver into the corners zone.
Recognition. As with most of the defensive positions, recognition can be vital. It can be the difference between -5 yards and a gain of 20 yards. A linebacker with good field awareness and recognition skills can put an end to a play before it even begins.
Block-shedding. They need to be able to shed the occasional blocker to make plays,which is hard when you are usually outweighed by a good amount. However, playing with smart leverage and hand movement/placement can shed any tight end or make it possible to shed a guard off you who has made it to the second level. This can become vital in run stopping situations against tough offensive lines.
Pass-rushing. Being able to shed a blocker sometimes isn't enough. Sometimes you need a linebacker to bring the heat and get behind the offensive line. This requires not only good leverage, strength and hand movement, but the genuine athleticism required to spin, swim, club and bull past offensive linemen.

While most linebackers only shine in one or two of these areas, they will still sometimes become stars. It depends on the scheme and what they will be asked to do; if a scheme requires the middle linebacker either to play a mid-field zone or to blitz in most of the plays, a speedy linebacker with some pass rush ability could become a star in that role. In a different scheme, if that middle linebacker is required to play a man up role on the running back and stuff the run, a speedy guy with good tackling skills and recognition will become the star.

4-3 Outside Linebackers

Outside linebackers in a 4-3 front are referred to as Will (for the weak, or non-tight end side) and Sam (for the strong, or tight end side).

Their roles will vary from defense to defense, but the genuine premise behind it is covering the area between the hash and the cornerback with run and coverage support based on their assignment for that play call.

While many defenses nowadays ask the same things of their outside linebackers (though not always the same assignments on the same playcall), there is a consensus view of the accepted strengths/weaknesses/roles of each. Some teams still use this formula, but as with everything else in the modern NFL, it's become much more diverse.

Sam linebackers are generally the bigger, stronger backers, better able to shed the block of a tight end. They line up over the tight end most of the time, and often times they are asked to jam and cover the end in passing situations. They usually get help from the strong safety in those cases

Will linebackers are generally the faster, more athletic linebackers. They are often called into zone coverage assignments and asked to cover or jam slot receivers in certain situations. They often cover the running back that attacks his side of the field first in man coverage, while covering the weak flat or hook/curl areas in zone coverage assignments.

4-3 Middle Linebackers

Middle linebackers in a 4-3 front are referred to as the Mike linebacker. They are usually responsible for receiving the defensive signals and relaying them to the rest of the unit. You could say they are the "quarterback of the defense."
Brain Urlacher, though a good tackler, is expected to play in coverage in Chicago's scheme.

Again, the roles they play vary from defense to defense. Generally, the Mike backer is assigned to protect the area between the hash marks and shut down the running back.

Depending on the scheme, they may simply be assigned to a particular gap, as would the outside linebackers. But the more popular use of a Mike linebacker is in pure run support from sideline to sideline, supporting both the defensive line and outside linebackers. Mid-field zones are also quite popular in passing situations. For all this, they are usually the most well-rounded and versatile linebacker on the field with the best ability to bring down a ball carrier 1 on 1.

Dealing with interior linemen from the offensive getting to the second level becomes a big problem with some middle linebacker, and it's become more and more of a neccessity for the Mike to be able to shed even the best blockers at times. A guy like Ray Lewis, as talented as he is, struggles at this aspect of the game and requires a large defensive front to ensure his freedom of movement.

3-4 Outside backers

Since the 3-4 is a scheme designed to conceal the fourth rusher, the outside linebackers in a 3-4 are often very pass-rush capable linebackers who possess the athleticism to be effective in zone and run coverages. This is quite a demanding position; not many pure linebackers are capable of being both a pass rusher and a run stuffer.

The weakside 3-4 backer is the one with the better pass rush ability. Playing opposite the tight end, they rely on the weakside defensive end to hinder the offensive tackle's ability to block them on the rush. They need to be quite athletic, speedy and capable of beating tackles to the edge to disrupt the quarterback. Outside of a pass rush assignment, they are generally responsible for covering the running back coming out of the backfield.

DeMarcus Ware is among the NFL's best, combining pass-rushing skills with run-stopping abilities.

The strongside 3-4 backer is the one with the more well rounded skill set. They must be able to rush the passer successfully, but will also be required to play coverage against the tight end and support the run coverage. They will usually pass the coverage of a running back coming out of the backfield to the strongside inside linebacker.

Because 3-4 outside linebacker requires such pass rush talents while remaining strong against the run, college defensive ends in 4-3 schemes are often drafted in an attempt to convert them to a 3-4 outside linebacker. They usually have pass rush ability, and -- having played on a defensive line -- they are already instinctively concerned about stopping the run. In the case of pure speed rushers like Dwight Freeney, these guys do not project to this position because they are usually not as stout against the run as a bigger pass rusher with a blend of power and speed rushing skills.

3-4 Inside Linebackers

Responsible for playing the role of Mike, Will and Sam, the inside linebackers must be strong in shedding blockers, playing the run, and covering the middle of the field in zone. Occasionally, depending on play call, the weakside inside linebackers will be required to play the role of Mike while the strongside backer plays in pass coverage, and vice versa. They need to be pretty versatile for those reasons.

The strongside inside backer is responsible for the tight endl, sharing many of the duties of a 4-3 Sam backer while splitting the duties of the Mike backer with the weakside linebacker.

The weakside inside linebacker will occasionally be responsible for maintaining a strong mid-field zone and has many of the duties that Will in a 4-3 would. He, too, splits the duties of the Mike backer with the other inside linebacker.

Summarizing it all

Linebackers are the safeties of the front 7. Depending on the scheme, they will have many different roles in a defense, but it all revolves around supporting the efforts of the down linemen and, occasionally, reinforcing the actions of the secondary. They need to be pure football players, capable of doing whatever is asked of them while maintaining a strong skill set, one that reflects what their team's scheme requires from the position.

While some defenses will require their linebackers to take a passive "wait and see" role and hold their ground, breaking big plays before they happen and giving up ground in small bits, others will ask their backers to be aggressive and attack plays with blitzes and proactive run coverage. Each of those schemes and every one in between require different forms of effort from each linebacker. You always need the right backer for the job.

8.14.08: Bringin' Home the Blogs

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 14:31:00 +0000

Every Tuesday and Thursday, I dig through the Sportopia to find the best posts to share with you, my loyal readers, like a father bringing home the bacon (or something like that). Now, I'm Bringin' Home the Blogs...

Racism in Spanish sports began long before the "slant-eyed" pictures. RUMORS AND RANTS has a rundown of the incidents, ranging from one-liners to organized chants. I find it amazing that people like Spanish columnist Jamie Martin justify this crap.

Spaniards want you to know this is, in now way, racist. Yep.

Since we're on the topic, CUZOOGLE has Jose Calderon's response to the outcry over the photo. Apparently, it was just a wink.

Steven Jackson, who continues to holdout, is really screwing with fantasy footballers. Will he be be the same? How far should his stock drop? Why did he have to do this?!?!!? The DEUCE OF DAVENPORT is certain on one thing: he's pissed!

After noting Xavier Lee's failed career, Rick Gosselin of WFAA examined how other 2004 Parade All-Americans have faired. Which ones transferred to D-II? Who's in the NFL? Gosh, I'm a sucker for this type of thing.

Jeremy Schaap won't stop staring at DAVE LOZO. I can only imagine the horror.

8.12.08: Bringin' Home the Blogs

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 17:36:00 +0000

Every Tuesday and Thursday, I dig through the Sports Blogtopia to find the best posts to share with you, my loyal readers, like a father bringing home the bacon (or something like that). Now, I'm Bringin' Home the Blogs...

In a great piece of (realistic) Olympic fiction, evil Yao and the Chinese commies scheme to snatch America's lone chance at redemption, trapping the "Redeem Team." Who, if anyone, is brave enough save them and the freedom they represent? Go to BLACK HEAR GOLD PANTS and join the fun!

Will this man be able to thwart China's sinister plot?

Are youth basketball coaches so focused on winning that player development takes a backseat? Yes, according to former NBA coach turned blogger ERIC MUSSELMAN.

THE LEGEND OF CECILIO GUANTE takes a look at the Yankees' failed youth movement. Talk about bringing smiles to the faces of Yankee haters everywhere!

Louis Williams, Sixers guard and future stud, signed a five-year, $25 million contract extension last week. In due time, he will be a bargain, writes EMPTY THE BENCH.

Now for some breaking news, courtesy of the WALKOFF WALK. The Reds pitchers are struggling, but fortunately for them, manager Dusty Baker knows the cure: running. That Dusty Baker sure knows how to handle young pitchers.^[1]

1. Friedell, Nick. "Did Dusty Baker learn nothing from Mark Prior and Kerry Wood?", Big League Stew.

Chris Kaman is a Hair Stylist!?!!?

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 15:39:00 +0000

Of all the news that I missed over the last week, nothing was more shocking than learning that Chris Kaman is a barber. For a refresher, here are a few pictures of Chris Kaman.

How does anybody turn to Chris Kaman for a haircut? Apparently, I wasn't the only one thinking along these same lines. Below is an exchange between Brad Townsend of the Dallas Morning News and Jason Kid.

Kidd: "Hey, have you talked to Dirk?"
Townsend: "Yeah. Have you seen his hair?"
Kidd: "Yeah. Man, who did that?"
Townsend: "Chris Kaman. If you are Dirk and you make his money, do you let Chris Kaman cut your hair?"
Kidd: "No way."

As you might have imagined, I would never let Chris Kaman touch my mane.

Kobe Starts His Hog, Or Why I Should Have Kept Watching

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 15:17:00 +0000

As I mentioned before, I skipped out on the end of the United States' thrashing of China. What a stupid mistake! I missed out on the following gem from Kobe. Thankfully, Tirico Suave has my back with the video and some masterful editing.

The "Redeem Team" Beats China: Irrational Hate, Truth, and a Five-Point Summary

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 16:53:00 +0000

I, like President Bush, was one of one billion fans who chose to watch the "Redeem Team" take on Yao Ming and his Chinese brethren. The United States won by an unknown (to me) final score. I, like President Bush, stopped watching when the game was over instead of when the game was officially over.

LeBron and the U.S. steamrolled through China.

There were a few thoughts -- recurring themes, if you will -- that kept coming to mind as I watched the game. They are:

I really, really, really dislike Dwyane Wade. If he ever decides to play with intelligence instead of relying solely on his athleticism, he would be as good as he is portrayed to be. Unfortunately, I've been saying that for years now. Defensively, Wade is still incapable of sliding his feet; instead, he runs alongside offensive players, jetting into passing lanes. Thankfully for the U.S., his opponents have been unable to convert.
Dwyane Wade needs to stop cherry-picking. I'm sorry, but I had to give this its own bullet. At least two times, Wade strolled back on defense, reached the three-point line, and after a Chinese miss, sprinted to the offensive end for an easy dunk. You can call it cherry-picking or sand-bagging (or whatever else), but this fact remains: you wouldn't get away with that crap at the YMCA. D-Wade does it in the Olympics?
Chris Paul has improved defensively. I know, China's guards aren't the physical types that typically give him fits, but Chris Paul was noticeably this time around. Following an exhibition game against China two years ago, I wrote this: "While I’m bashing some of the NBA’s young stars, I might as well hoop on over to the Chris Paul bandwagon... where I subsequently beat the driver of the aforementioned wagon with a baseball bat. Chris Paul is quickly becoming the most overrated player in the NBA; sure, he’s a step above spectacular offensively, but he cannot stay in front of his man for the life of him (at which time I flash back to Carlos Arroyo shooting a lay-up while CP3 was still scratchin’ his head at the free throw line). At this point he isn’t even average defensively." Obviously, I can't write that anymore.
Jason Kidd has no business playing, let alone starting. During the telecast, Mike Breen mentioned that Dara Torres was an inspiration to an old-in-the-tooth Jason Kidd. I laughed. Torres -- despite her age -- posted the best split on her medley team, whereas Kidd is easily third-fiddle at his own position. Deron Williams and Chris Paul are better creators, shooters, and -- at least today -- defenders. Experience didn't really do much for Kidd.
LeBron James is really a fine player. Need I say more?

Gary Coleman Ejected in Baseball Debut!

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Sat, 02 Aug 2008 14:34:00 +0000

Yesterday, we reported the Madison Mallards' contract offer to Gary Coleman. As it turns out, Coleman decided to accept their proposal and made his baseball debut last night. He was promptly thrown out.

Here's the video:
Thankfully, the ump comes through with a short joke!

Gary Coleman to Play Minor League Baseball?

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:13:00 +0000

The Madison Mallards, a minor league baseball team in the midsts of a playoff push, are willing to win at all costs. The Mallards, in what is being considered an unprecedented move, have offered a contract to a former star: Gary Coleman of Different Strokes fame.

“As the Mallards prepare for the playoffs we feel that we need a special player to help put us over the top,” said Stenman. “Gary brings a lot of intangibles to the field and I feel like his presence would help invigorate our club as they get ready for a run at a championship. You can’t coach a strike zone like Gary has and I anticipate him being a force at the top of our lineup.”

Manager C.J. Thieleke is excited about the possibility to work with the star.

“I feel like he could develop a couple different strokes to rule the Northwoods League,” said Thieleke.

Under league rules, Coleman would not earn a paycheck for his play. He has yet to accept the contract offer. Until then, Mallards and their fans will be keeping their fingers crossed.

Tip of the Undrafted Free Agent's hat to THE SPORTS POINT.

Manny Ramirez Hates Troops, Kids With Cancer!

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 14:26:00 +0000

The Red Sox have ridded themselves of their major malcontent, Manny Ramirez, by trading him to the Dodgers. In the weeks leading up to the trade, it was obvious the relationship between club and star was deteriorating. I mean, just ask Buster Olney: it took Manny 5.7 seconds to run out a grounder; that's glacial in baseball terms!

As with any nasty breakup, both sides will try to paint the other as the bad guy. Manny had his turn yesterday, saying the Red Sox were a bunch of backstabbers. No word from the team.

I can only imagine what the writers, who no longer rely on Manny for interviews, will have to say...

Manny Ramirez beats on the elderly.
Manny Ramirez hates kids dying from cancer.
Manny Ramirez fakes injuries.
Manny Ramirez hits his teammates.
Manny Ramirez hates the troops.
Manny Ramirez didn't keep a promise that he made when he was in his teens.
Manny Ramirez is the biggest bum ever.

Wow.

So, Mr. Callahan, why wait until Manny was traded to share this with his (former) fans? Were you afraid to write, "Hey, you know that guy you fans adore? He's a real jerk," when the fans still supported him? Were you under orders to keep that stuff quiet? What gives?

Now, I'm not defending Manny Ramirez. Most likely, he is a jerk. I just love how some writers sit on this stuff until after the fact.

7.31.08: Bringin' Home the Blogs

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 19:19:00 +0000

Everyday, I dig through the Sports Blogtopia to find the best posts to share with you, my loyal readers, like a father bringing home the bacon (or something like that). Now, I'm Bringin' Home the Blogs...

Now on his fourth team, Kwame Brown may be fighting for his NBA career. That is, if he shows the desire to be an NBA player, writes EMPTY THE BENCH. So maybe I was presumptuous with that "fighting" word.

JOE SPORTS FAN gave Tyson Gay with his own MySpace page, and look at all the sports celebrities that stopped by!

I'm often approached on the streets by adoring fans who ask, "Hey, Ron, if you were a sports legend, what would you do?" Why, help a mob family buy my former team, of course! THE SPORTS POINT has the story of the soccer player who did just that.

Finally, today marks the end of July, and all I can say is "finally." RUMORS AND RANTS has the thirty-one reasons that really made it suck.

Olympic Opening Ceremony Is No Longer Ancient Chinese Secret

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 16:38:00 +0000

China brought out all the stops for the opening ceremony of the Beijing Olympics. The country's most famous director, Zhang Yimou, spent three years designing a 10,000-man production that was to encompass 5,000 years of Chinese history.

The entire show was to be a grand surprise, a secret. That is, until those pesky South Koreans got involved. A video crew captured and aired images of whales, a colorful globe, high-flying performers, and a choreographed countdown during a rehearsal.

Sun Weide, an Olympics spokesperson, acknowledged the leak was "disappointing," but said "the fragments cannot demonstrate the full picture of the spectacular opening ceremony."

Whew! That's a relief!

So how, exactly, did the South Korean network even get into the rehearsal? There was no sneaking involved; all they had to do was show officials their ID cards.

In other news, researchers have discovered an inverse relationship between Chinese capitalism and (ancient) Chinese secret-keeping ability.

7.30.08: Bringin' Home the Blogs

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 16:48:00 +0000

Everyday, I dig through the Sports Blogdome to find the funniest, most informative postings to share with you, my loyal readers. Now, I'm Bringin' Home the Blogs...

THE WIZARD OF ODDS has a message to the Internetz from Coach Spurrier: "Don't tell my recruits about my players' arrests." Of course, I'm just paraphrasing.

"See! Even he knows three of the charges have been dropped!"

I have been known to complain about athletes bolting for more money. That's why one point, addressing loyalty, stood out in THE HARDBALL TIMES' reply to Buzz Bissinger.

Join THE SPORTS HERNIA for some fill-in fun featuring Aaron "____" Rodgers!

What happens when Oprah's book club and the NBA collide? You get another great set of fun photoshops from CUZOOGLE. The D'Antoni Code is good, but the plot structure is strikingly similar to Angels & Demons.

"Can every athlete in the world be tied to Derek Jeter through his many Hollywood Flings?" THE WORLD OF ISAAC gave it a good try.

WARNING: Before clicking the following link, be prepared to invest at least 30 minutes watching videos. With twenty dunk attempts gone painfully wrong, ATHLISTS shows there are twenty ways to die while dunking the basketball.

If 30 seconds sounds better, here's the nastiest of all the videos.

This Year in Hilariously Awkward NBA Photo Shoots: Rookie Edition

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 12:00:00 +0000

Every summer, the NBA gathers its rookies together for a publicity photo shoot, and every summer, I become more and more convinced the photographers try to make the pictures fun creating awkward poses. This year, the rookies -- especially Joe Alexander -- are hilarious as ever.

(Note: If you want the large versions, click on the pictures.)

For fifteen cents a day, you can save an impoverished child like Anthony Randolph.

JaVale McGee, equipped with a headband and laser eyes, will destroy you.

What is he grabbing? OMGZ!

"All I wanted was a big boy chair."

Mario had to stand on the stool, and he didn't even get a number?!!?!

While tiptoeing, Mario changed his tune; the stool wasn't so bad after all.

Roy Hibbert is one seductive seven-foot-three-er. Ladies...

Has any 6-10 power forward been transformed into a nonathletic point guard through the magic of film?

Middle school volleyball players don't even dare to try this pose.

Joe "I'm Just Programmed to Stiffen Up in Front of Cameras, OK!" Alexander. (Editor's Note: Despite his up-and-coming porn 'stache, we did not intend for the double meaning in Joe's nickname. The Undrafted Free Agent regrets the error.)

Little known fact: Joe Alexander was a top-ranked Chinese star-throwing ninja before returning to the United States. Hence this picture.

Joe being Joe With Hand.

It may just be me, but there seems to be a bit of The Price is Right in this pose.

Joe has loads of charisma.

Finally, Joe isn't the focal point of awkward in a picture (though he is still giving the photographers a run for their money)!

7.29.08: Bringin' Home the Blogs

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 15:47:00 +0000

In what will become a daily feature, I will dig through Sports Blogdome to find the funniest, most informative postings. I'm Bringin' Home the Blogs...

What happens when a Syracuse football recruit doesn't give Coach Robinson a call? As TROY NUNES IS AN ABSOLUTE MAGICIAN shows, the coach leaves one hilarious phone message.

Robinson is probably one of the few normal football coaches.

Matt Millen, resembling a certain Caddyshack character in TIRICO SUAVE'S mind, shot a groundhog. Who did he consult when it came time to create a groundhog stew? None other than ESPN's favorite formerly-retired quarterback.

After years of Yankee fans questioning Goose Goosage's Hall of Fame snub, he finally made it. According to one writer at BUGS & CRANKS, we should end the injustice and let every Yankee into Cooperstown.

So, how about Fernando Tatis? He's had a pretty strong resurgence. Maybe we should give him some props, says THE LEGEND OF CECILIO GUANTE.

JUICED SPORTS BLOG is in search of Loser-ville, USA. Chances the winner will be some high school town? There is no chance, thankfully.

White Sox Fan Beaten By Cubs Fans, Loses Eye

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 13:15:00 +0000

Disturbing news out of Chicago today: Drunken Cubs fans acted like drunken Cubs fans. That wasn't good news for the lone White Sox backer in the group:

McHenry County authorities say three Chicago Cubs fans face felony battery charges after allegedly beating a Chicago White Sox fan so badly he lost his right eye.

The men are accused of beating 32-year-old Robert Steele of Gurnee during a 2-year-old girl's Sesame Street-themed birthday party.

Police said Monday the men were drinking alcohol at the July 19th party and taunting Steele.

This is just the latest in a growing trend of rivalry violence. In May, a Yankee-loving woman drove her car into and killed a Red Sox fan after an argument -- which consisted of creative chants like "Yankees suck!" -- (shockingly) in a bar. Then earlier this month, a group of Red Sox fans beat a man with a baseball bat, figuring his New York license plates meant he was a Yankees fan. He wasn't, and they weren't even drunk.

So what does this all mean? People shouldn't get plastered when they are with a rival.

Great T-Shirt for Evil Mets Fans!

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 13:36:00 +0000

Shea Stadium is as dangerous as ever: Another fan fell off the escalator, leading to serious injuries. Man, riding on the handrails might not have been a great idea.

Here at the Undrafted Free Agent, little sympathy is spared for stupidity. As such, we have created a t-shirt for like-minded Mets fans. Enjoy.

Front

Back

Josh Hamilton's Not So Inspirational Story

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 15:20:00 +0000

Nine years ago, Josh Hamilton was on top of the world, becoming the top draft pick of the (then) Tampa Bay Devil Rays. Early on, he didn't disappoint, showing his immense talent in the minor leagues.

Unfortunately, things didn't last. Hamilton began to struggle with injuries, and an addiction to cocaine began. In the years that followed, his life reached new lows: seven failed rehab attempts, five suicide tries, and (the least of his worries) three lost seasons.

Then in 2005, he turned things around. Having found strength in God, Hamilton's eight attempt at rehab worked. Two years later, he made his return to baseball with the Reds. He hit .292 with 19 home runs before being traded to the Rangers. He has yet to disappoint; the Hambino is hitting .308 with 22 homers and 98 RBI in route to his first All-Star appearance.

Oh, and he had 28 home runs in the first round of the Home Run Derby, adding frosting to the cake that is his recovery story. Who could resist such a perfect story? Nobody. Not the media. Not the public. Josh Hamilton was an inspiration for us all and addicts everywhere!

Shakespeare DiMaggio of Tirico Suave says not so fast; is Josh Hamilton really all that inspirational?

When I think of inspirational sports stories, I think of Lance Armstrong dominating the Tour De France after beating cancer. How about Ray Ray McElrathbey raising his younger brother and playing Division One ball for Clemson. Jim Abbott overcoming his disability and carving out a nice Major League Career. Or even Jason McElwain dropping 20 in 4 minutes. I don’t think of a guy who dealt with the adversity of an injury by taking up crack.

The people who would best identify with Josh Hamilton's story would be fellow drug addicts. But would they find all that much inspiration? Your run-of-the-mill junkie can't afford quality rehab clinics, let alone eight. Your average addict doesn't have a handler following him around, making sure he stays away from his vices.

The typical junkie isn't a talented baseball player.

If I was a drug addict, I think I might even resent Josh Hamilton.

Dirk: Crybaby, Olympian

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 13:09:00 +0000

Germany clinched its first Olympic birth since 1992 on Sunday with a win over Puerto Rico. Surely, Dirk Nowitzki and native American turned German Chris Kaman were thrilled.

Unfortunately, the only comments about the victory came from Kaman, who said, "I've only been here 12 days but Dirk has waited 12 years for this to happen. I can't even imagine the emotions that he must be feeling at this moment."

If he looked around the German locker room, Kaman could have seen the result of Dirk's emotions. Dirk, according to a blunt story in the Star-Telegram, was crying. A lot.

The Dallas Mavericks’ best player was in the locker room in Greece bawling Sunday, like a baby or newlywed or player who has finally delivered on a promise to his country, his coach and himself.

Like a baby?!? I'm sure Dirk would have preferred his cry-fest be kept quiet, but can the description get any more harsh? Bawling should be reserved for situations like this:

Dirk managed to hold back tears in the past.

WKU Football Team Goes Door-to-Door Selling Tickets

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 13:31:00 +0000

Are you having trouble drawing fans to your football games? Do you want to create a connection with the fans while building team chemistry? Would you like to gain a better understanding of the business of college football?

Well, if you are play for Western Kentucky's football team, selling tickets door-to-door is for you!

Starting next week, nearly 100 WKU players and coaches will hit the pavement of local neighborhoods offering season tickets for $25. They will be split into for teams, and the team that sells the most wins a steak dinner.

“We had tremendous success with this initiative last year, and I am pleased we will be doing it again,” WKU coach David Elson said. “It enables our team to interact with the community that gives us such great support while also giving our student-athletes a unique perspective to the business side of athletics.

“I also believe good-natured competitions such as this help build team chemistry.”

Hopefully the sale is a success for WKU. Just watch out for any locals who open their doors expecting Girl Scout Cookies only to find football tickets.

Papelbon and Wife Threatened By New York Fans

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 01:15:00 +0000

Who would threaten a pregnant women? If she is carrying Jonathan Papelbon's baby and is his wife, a small minority of Yankee fans would. Or, at the very least, they would create a situation that makes her feel threatened.

That's what happened during MLB's All-Star parade down the New York streets. Now, we have video of some of the remarks directed at the couple.

For some crazy reason, I bet they heard worse.

What You Could Have Done With the 4 Hours and 50 Minutes You Spent Watching an Exhibition Baseball Game

noreply@blogger.com (Drew H.) — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 12:10:00 +0000

Last night's All-Star game was a record-setting 4 hours and 50 minutes long. Please don't tell me you wasted your night watching (or even worse, live blogging) the game. There were so many things you could have done, like:

I firmly believe my prayers were answered when Justin Morneau scored to end last night's All-Star game. There is no other answer.

Play 3,456 games of Rock, Paper, Scissors. Oddly enough, Clint Hurdle and Terry Francona would have played a best-of-one game if they ran out of pitchers.
Watch Joey Chestnut eat 1,641 dogs. We here at the Undrafted Free Agent are confident that Joey Jaws will maintain his pace.
Knockout Jose Canseco 7,293 times. That's a lot, even if it's just a rough calculation (read: random throwing together of digits). For the record, when I win, I will donate 85% of my earnings to the charity of my choice.
Run the bases 864 times. Fatigue will never set in, allowing you to maintain a Prince Fielder-esque speed throughout.
Watch the Chevrolet Man's dreadfully long MVP presentation 3.79 times. Just an aside: if anyone out there is listening, I need video of Chevrolet Man (like I needed proof that Roger Clemens used steroids) saying something like "baseball fans are awesome" before waiting for the fans to roar with their approval. The silence was deafening and really, really awkward.
Write 57 kind letters to Florida Marlins second baseman under various names. Tell him to stay positive, that he is a fine defensive player. Forget that no All-Star has ever had as many errors in a single game.
Reread the Mitchell Report twice and in its entirety. Notice how so few of the players named were at the game? They really are cleaning the game of steroids. Yeah, Bud!
Change your mind about retirement no less than 5 times. Who cares? We don't have a legacy to ruin.
Heat up no less than 1,193 times while playing a nostalgic game of NBA Jam, including 2,746 shots from downtown!
Sleep.

What if Justin Morneau hadn't scored? Me thinks the game should have been decided on "rock, paper, scissors, chute!"

With so many activities to choose from, no wonder you decided to watch the All-Star game.